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A Conservative MP today described the terrifying moment he was held at gunpoint and forced to eat coffee whitener to persuade a group of excitable Colombian soldiers that he was not a drugs trafficker.
Michael Fabricant, who represents the Staffordshire consitutuency of Lichfield and Burntwood, was on a South American trekking holiday with a friend last week when he was stopped by the men toting M16 rifles.
The soldiers searched through their bags and found an unlabelled jar of Coffee Mate - which Mr Fabricant had packed because he did not want to risk drinking fresh milk. Unfortunately, the soldiers thought it was cocaine - sometimes dubbed 'Colombian marching powder'.
“It took some explanation, as I don’t speak more than two or three words in Spanish, for them to accept it was Coffee Mate," the MP, now safely back in Westminster, said today.
“They didn’t want to taste it as pure cocaine is fairly poisonous so I had to eat several mouthfuls in front of them, with guns aimed at me, until they could see that it had no ill effect - except afterwards I felt as sick as a dog.”
Mr Fabricant, 58, who is best known around Westminster for his shock of blond hair, said that he would bear the experience in mind for the future: “I would not wish to unnecessarily cause the risk of a by-election."
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I am a constituent of Michael's; he is much loved and admired in Lichfield. As Ian says, it's great to have such a gregarious MP who stands up for local issues and who stands out in a sea of grey in the Commons
Neil, Lichfield,
I wonder if he's ever tried snorting the coffee whitener? If he has, it might explain the coiffure.
Peter, Suffolk,
If your taking a large jar of coffee whitner to that country what do you expect!! Hope he puts more thought into his polices!! ... What on earth are you on about!? So you'd expect to have a gun held to your head if took powdered milk to columbia would you?.
alan, buxton, derbyshire
I seem to remember a Peter Kay stand-up routine with the same outcome. If only Fabricant was a fan, he could have avoided all that aggro! But really, taking bags of white powder to Columbia? Or anywhere abroad? He really didn't think that through...
Sophie, Liverpool,
I'm suprised the Columbian soldiers didn't mistake the honourable MP for a rabid Alsatian and begin firing on sight.
A testament to the professionalism of these cool-headed soldiers.
Kazuki, Tokyo, Japan
I would not wish to unnecessarily cause the risk of a by-election." I am Colombian and I think the humoristic tone he used in the interview is very insulting. Drug trafficking is a serious problem; hundreds of thousands of civilians in Colombia have died in a war against it!
Juan Cajigas, London ,
Great wig - been looking for one of those for the fancy dress box!
Not sure if we are suppose to take this MP seriously?
Matt, Torquay, UK
Wannabe Borish Johnson, doesn;'t he look a little like Kevin, from Kevin and Perry...
If your taking a large jar of coffee whitner to that country what do you expect!! Hope he puts more thought into his polices!!
Adam Webb, MK, UK
Nice picture!
You'd have thought that they would have broken the mould after they made Boris Johnson!
Tim, Wrexham, Wales
As a former constituent of Michael's [LICHFIELD], I feel he is a real character and is a great constituency MP. We need people like him in Parliament - colourful and not scared to speak the truth !!!!!!!!!!!!!
CARRY ON Michael...............!!!!!
ian payne, WALSALL,